He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children. —Psalm 113:9

December 20, 2010

All the days are bleeding together, and I feel middle-aged.

The mountain is starting to look smaller.

We've secured help from my family for moving the big stuff. We're probably only keeping less than half of the furniture, and donating the rest to John 3:16 Mission. They'll come and collect the stuff that's going to them. There's still a ton of small stuff to pack and move. It's amazing how much stuff two people living in a tiny one-bedroom apartment could amass over the years. Matt and I have been going over there every day to pack up a carload's worth and bring it back here. It's sad and depressing work, watching that apartment grow emptier and emptier, looking less and less like the warm and welcoming home that his mother made it into.

Rob is still stuck in limbo in his hospital room, waiting for acceptance into a nursing home. We thought he'd get an answer on his application today, but so far there hasn't been any news. He's miserable, lonely and depressed, and he misses his wife, and his cat, and his home that he'll never be able to go back to. He needs prayer, y'all. We're praying that he'll be moved to his new home before Christmas.

I cleaned out the garage over the weekend, to make room to store Mom's things. I hauled off three truckloads of recycling that had accumulated in there over the last two years. In our defense, the reason it started to accumulate in the first place was because the alleged curb-side recycling program we subscribed to when we moved in never once picked up the recycling we left out at the curb. By the time we got fed up enough to cancel the program and demand our money back, it had already piled up to an overwhelming amount. After that, procrastination took hold. Of course, if I had known that there was a recycling center only two miles away, where all I had to do was pull the truck up and a swarm of workers would make all the recycling go away, without my even having to sort anything, I would have taken care of it much sooner. But I didn't know that. Now that I do, it won't become a problem again.

Today we're taking a break from packing and hospitals and empty apartments, to stay home and rest our bodies and answer e-mail and make phone calls. I set up a Facebook Community page about Mom's memorial service, so you can go there and "Like" the page if you want to stay informed about how & when that's coming together. Planning that is still the least pressing item on our To Do list, but I think we're ready to start thinking in that direction.

We still need to get power of attorney over Rob's finances so we can get his Social Security settled and set him up with his own bank account. We still need to do about a million little things to settle Mom's estate, but we're still waiting on the death certificate. I think once we get Rob settled, and get the apartment cleared out, the sense of urgency will be past and things will start to return to normal, or as normal as they can be when your loved one is permanently absent.

I want to say thanks again to everyone who's been reaching out to help, in ways both big and small. The big stuff is amazing, and we're so grateful, but you would be surprised how much the small things mean to us right now. So please don't apologize if you feel like your contribution "isn't much." It all means so, so much to us, we can't even tell you. In these heavy times even the smallest kindness does a great deal to lighten our hearts.

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