He settles the childless woman in her home as a happy mother of children. —Psalm 113:9

May 11, 2011

Hormone Hell

I'm having kind of a rough day. I think it started before I went to bed last night, when I started feeling really lonely and isolated. That feeling was triggered by that Sprint commercial with the lady who's turning 100, and the shot of her and her (presumed) granddaughter making funny faces at each other. It sent me down this rabbit hole of thinking about how my grandparents are all long gone, and so is my dad, and now so are my in-laws, and I don't really feel that close to the family that I do have. I shouldn't say that, because it will probably hurt some feelings, and now I'm feeling like I should backpedal and qualify that statement, but whether it's true or not, this is what I was feeling last night.

And then today I woke up feeling inexplicably angry at my husband, and just generally irritable. I woke up this way on Monday, too. I think being off of the BCP must be wreaking havoc with my hormones--which is another reason I wish wish wish that I could just stay off of it and get this adjustment period over with.

Anyway, I prayed about it and cried it all out, and now I'm feeling mostly better. I'm a little antsy and wish I could get out of the house for a while, just take my work to a coffee shop for a few hours like most other freelancers do all the time, but there are severe storms heading this way, so I'd better just stay home. Even if I did go to a coffee shop, I couldn't afford a latte anyway right now. :p


Hope said...

(((Hugs))) Sorry you are having such a rough day!

Ed said...

Bummer. I hate the rabbit hole. Hugs to you!

Ann said...

Every time I hit day 19 in my pill, everything Derek does (or doesn't do) pisses me off beyond speech. I pick fight with him, I itch to kick the cats and break things just to make. me. feel. better.

And then day 22 rolls around and I'm a cheerful (if somewhat remorseful) person again.

When we do start trying for the kidlet, it better happen fast, or one of us will kill the other.

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